Early intervention, influencing policy and social change
Griffith University stands firm in its commitment to reduce harm and build a better future for all with several key initiatives aimed at preventing violence and facilitating peaceful, just, and equitable communities. The MATE Bystander program (Motivation Action Through Empowerment) and the Disrupting Violence Beacon, a strategic initiative that aligns and enacts Griffith’s values and aims to be a ‘game-changer’ in influencing how our society thinks about and responds to violence.
Dave Kramer is a behavioural scientist currently investigating domestic violence in culturally and linguistically diverse communities. His mission began in 2017 when he partnered with a not-for-profit in Brisbane to raise funds and support youth experiencing homelessness.
Then, after the horrific and sudden passing of his best friend and training partner, Hannah Clarke, and her three children, Aaliyah, Laianah and Trey, his mission took a new direction. Dave now partners with organisations such as MATE Bystander, with the purpose of preventing further atrocities like that experienced in February 2020.
Dave believes that true prevention will come from early intervention and influencing policy and social change. With this in mind Dave will continue beyond his study with a career in research, so that all support offered to MATE and the wider community, to prevent domestic violence, is informed, effective and available to everyone.”
Losing Hannah, Aaliyah, Laianah and Trey
“The impact of losing Hannah and Aaliyah, Laianah and Trey has been never ending. They were in every part of my life and one day I left the gym, I gave Laianah a hug and she just embraced me. She was a little four year old girl but she gave a hug like no one else I’ve ever experienced. I came back the next day to the gym and I was like ‘geez Aaliyah gave me such a beautiful hug yesterday (to Hannah)’ and she goes, ‘yeah, I know, I said that to her and she said I just feel like he needs bigger hugs because he’s always by himself’ and so a little four-year-old girl right and that was the kind of heart that all of them had. I definitely had a stronger bond with Han. Han and I just were on the same page on the same level for a lot of different
things we had this thing you’ll see on my whiteboard over there it says ‘leave it at the door’ it was something that we took into the gym with us every time or we didn’t take into the gym right as soon as we got to the gym we put all our stuff down at the door – our emotional baggage all that sort of stuff – we went in and we did the job she did that incredibly well given everything that she was dealing with at the time.”
“There were certain things that I felt uncomfortable with like the way he spoke to her when we were training like when the kids would fight over an iPad or something like that when we were all training all three of us were training … he would yell at her and say ‘the kids are your responsibility you know you’re the woman you’re the mother go and look after the kids’ rather than being standing right next to the kids
and yelling at Hannah to say you know ‘this is your job’. At the time I was like that I mean they’re right there you can you can deal with that situation you know? it just seemed uncomfortable”.
” … he would yell at her and say ‘the kids are your responsibility you know you’re the woman you’re the mother go and look after the kids’… “
“I’ve learned so much about coercive control since Han died and the kids, I I just I think it’s hard to pinpoint the main things that I’ve learned about it but those those big key factors of what DV looks like as a relationship are really important the the power imbalance the fact that one person is trying to use power and control over the other person and they’re doing that through that pattern of controlling behaviours. The fact that coercive control includes a variety of different behaviours that may not include violence, may not include physical abuse, and then that fear and anxiety and the reason why someone might feel like they need to stay in that relationship right … like the safety of their children the safety of themselves may depend on being inside that relationship starting conversations early recognising, getting education around what coercive control is is really important because the laws won’t save everyone. They might save a few but ultimately it’s going to take a cultural change to save people’s lives. Australia needs to change the way we view violence. We need to change the way we do women we need to improve on the way that we treat each other so if we’re going to do that it’s going to start with conversations with our friends with our family.”
Behind the Doors of Domestic Violence
Listen to Dave share his experience in the first episode of ‘Behind the Doors of Domestic Violence” podcast presented by the Queensland Police Service which aims to raise community awareness, empower victim survivors and bystanders alike and ultimately change the behaviours of those who use abusive tactics within their relationships. Hosted by Dean Cooper, from the Griffith University MATE Bystander program, this five-part series will tell the stories of victim survivors and bystanders, delve into the mindset of an offender, discuss police initiatives, identify characteristics of unhealthy and unsafe relationships and speak to the support services available for those seeking help, both victims and perpetrators.
Author
Dave Kramer is a Behavioural Scientist currently investigating domestic violence in culturally and linguistically diverse communities as part of an Honours Psychology project at Queensland University of Technology,
His mission began in 2017 when he partnered with a not-for-profit in Brisbane to raise funds and support youth experiencing homelessness. Then, after the horrific and sudden passing of his best friend and training partner, Hannah Clarke, and her three children, Aaliyah, Laianah and Trey, his mission took a new direction. Dave now partners with organisations such as MATE Bystander, with the purpose of preventing further atrocities like that experienced in February 2020.